Leaks come in all shapes and sizes. But one thing is for sure: whether it’s leaking oil, leaking water, leaking secrets or leaking negativity, leaks can cause a mess!
Just ask me. On Monday a backyard pipe burst causing a leak that flooded not only our yard but also our neighbor’s. (Check out my last blog post) Can’t wait to see that water bill.
But a water leak is minor compared to leaks that cause emotional and psychological devastation. I have yet to meet a woman who doesn’t struggle with these kinds of leaks in one form or another.
One woman struggles with a leaking critical spirit.
One with leaking confidence
One with leaking anger
One with leaking bitterness
One with leaking resentment
One with leaking depression
One with leaking unmet expectations
One with leaking gossip
And on it goes….
Oh, we try to contain our leaks. We tell ourselves to “just get it together and be nice”. Or excuse our leaks by saying “everyone struggles in some way”. Or ignore our leaks, hoping if we don’t acknowledge them they will eventually disappear.
But just like a water pipe that contains too much pressure, eventually the pressures of life become too much to restrain and – BAM! We’re leaking our gunk all over tarnation.
So, how do we stop the leaks?
We start with the source.
When my water pipe burst I didn’t attempt to fix the pipe (as if that would even be in the realm of reality for me!). No. I tried to find the water source and cut it off. I knew I had to stop the flow.
It’s the same thing with emotional leaks. We have to stop the flow.
In other words, as Proverbs 31 president, Lysa Terkeurst says, we must pause. Pause long enough to think. Pause enough to ask “what will happen if I say this, do this, think this, right now?”
But for leaks that recur over and over – like the one coming from my broken backyard pipe – a more permanent fix must be found. We had to replace our pipe. You and I need to replace what’s happening in our souls. Jesus said, “Out of the overflow of the heart a man speaks”. Did you catch that phrasing? Out of the overflow….
When we find an area that keeps flooding our relationships, our joy or our peace of mind, we need to check what’s going on in our hearts. Because the overflow of what is happening in my heart leaks out onto those around me.
For most us, figuring out what’s going on in our hearts requires three things:
1. Identifying our triggers.
2. Replacing false thoughts with true thoughts
3. Replacing negative actions with positive actions.
How do these three things make a difference in real life? Well, for starters, when you identify your personal triggers you can recognize building pressure and offset a flood. For instance, I know that being tired, late or in the midst of PMS are huge triggers for me. How about you? What are your triggers?
Replacing false thoughts happens when I open my Bible and let the reality of who God is and who I am invade my mind. My emotions don’t often lead me into the land of truth, so I must let my mind take me there through God’s word. Jesus said “You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free.”
Want to be free of some recurring leak in your life? Then envelope your mind in God’s truth.
Changing my actions means being proactive about fixing my leaks. My mother once gave me some fabulous parenting advice: “Always stay one step ahead of your kids”. She meant that I should anticipate moments my children were likely to misbehave and plan in advance how I would respond.
It would serve us well to stay one step ahead of ourselves.
If I plan in advance how I will respond when my girlfriends start to gossip or my husband doesn’t buy me the right gift or my boss criticizes my work or my mother-in-law questions my parenting, then my chances for responding appropriately become greatly increased.
And I very well may avoid a big, fat, messy leak.
So how about it, girls? Can we stop flooding those we love with our leaky junk? We can when we stop the flow. And we stop the flow by recognizing the Source.
