I received the funniest advertisement today in the mail. In big, bold letters emblazoned on the front of the card was the question, “Donna J. HAVE YOU HAD A HISSY FIT?”
I laughed out loud because, of course, the answer is “yes”. I’ve been known to have a hissy fit a time or two during the last 25 years of marriage and child rearing. Hopefully, not too many. Still, there have been moments…..
Maybe you’ve had a few hissy fits of your own.
What provokes a relatively calm woman to explode? One of the primary causes is displaced anger. You’re mad a one person, but take it out on another. For instance, you’re angry that your husband is late…again, so you yell at the kids because their shoes are all over the place. You’re angry that your teenager made a stupid decision, so you get in a tiff with your husband for not being more in touch. Your angry at a rude salesperson, so you bad mouth the poky driver in front of you.
The kids, the husband or the driver aren’t the source of your anger, but they’re the recipients of it. That’s displaced anger.
Anger is a human emotion. It’s OK to be angry about some things. Jesus was. Jesus got mad at the religious swindlers. Jesus became infuriated at those who took advantage of the less fortunate. But Jesus never had a hissy fit. Jesus expressed his anger at the person he was angry with – and he did it in the right way, for the right reasons.
Anger is one of those touchy emotions Christians have a really, really hard time navigating correctly. Somehow many believers buy into the notion that all anger is “bad”. Good Christian women never, ever get angry. Mercy, no.
There’s just two problems with this scenario: it’s not realistic and it’s not biblical. Real people get mad.
The question then becomes, how do I deal with my anger appropriately? For starters, when you express your anger, make sure you are expressing anger to the person you’re really angry with and you’re discussing the thing you’re really angry about.
Will chat about this more later, but for now just think about how you deal with anger. Do you ever displace it? If so, it might be time to replace it.
