“What should I have done differently?”
It was an odd question, mainly because it came from my mother–a terrific mom in every respect. Her question got me thinking: why do those who are the best moms worry most they are not?
Mom guilt. It’s real. We know we’re not perfect, so we worry and we wonder whether we’re good moms. Or not.
If I had a dime for every woman I’ve heard express some form of mom guilt I’d be a very rich woman. Of course, there are mothers who should have remorse for their lack of good parenting, but sadly, these moms rarely admit it.
Instead, it’s a good mom who most often worries that she’s a bad mom. Perhaps it’s because good moms love so deeply, and care so passionately, they wonder if what they do–or what they did–is enough.
But how do you measure “enough?” Especially when it comes to motherhood?
Proverbs 31 says,
28 Her children stand and bless her.
Her husband praises her:
29 “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world,
but you surpass them all!”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last;
but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.
31 Reward her for all she has done.
Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.
Maybe it’s impossible for a mom to know if she loved enough, cared enough, encouraged enough, shared enough, provided enough, and guided enough, unless her family tells her.
What do moms really need for Mother’s Day?
Simply this: the knowledge that what they did, and what they do day, after day, after day, is enough.
If you are blessed with a good mom why not tell her what she did for you is appreciated?
And if you know a good mom–whether she is your mom or not–tell her, too. God often fills the gaps our real moms created with women who are more like mothers to us than our real moms were.
A mother is anyone who cares for us, supports us, encourages us, listens to us, advises us, or directs us. A mother is someone who loves us. Period.
In its purest form, Mother’s Day is our opportunity to stand and bless the women who blessed us.
And, if you are a mom, wondering if you’re doing (or did) a good job, let me whisper something in your ear: Look at verse 30, written above. Do you see it? “A woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.” If you are trying to please God as a mom, God sees and God applauds your heart and your efforts.
You are loved (and that’s enough!),
Donna
P.S. If you’re reading this after Mother’s Day, remember: any day is a great day to bless a woman who has blessed you!
P.S.S. I have some great episodes about parenting on my podcast, “That’s Just What I Needed”. You can find the podcast on all your favorite podcast platforms. And, if you haven’t followed me yet on social media, I’d love to connect with you there! On instagram I’m at@donnaajones. On Facebook you’ll find me at Donna Jones, Speaker & Author.
xo,
Donna
